There is a famous saying that says, “breaking up is hard to do”.
Well, it is actually a Neil Sekada song that was famous during the 70s and was, back then a national anthem for break up. But is it really that hard to do?
If you come to think about it, break-up is simple science: You don’t want it, you end it. But what comes after — the complications, the sudden realization, the loneliness, the guilt — is probably gonna affect you for weeks or months, depending on the situation and how well you take the relationship seriously.
The thing is: there is no really a one, easy formula for breaking up with someone. Every situation and every girl is different: You can be with someone who’s so gentle and it would seem so hard for you to end the relationship or you could be with an independent party girl and you know she can handle the break-up or whatever life throws are her pretty well.
If you are really keen on doing the breakup and you are probably reading a lot of articles and blog posts you came across with when you search “breaking up with a girl” on Google, well, these steps and tips might help you a bit. Read on.
1. Think about it long and hard.
Be sure on what you want. If you’ve been hooking up with this girl for so long and you don’t want to take it to the next level or seriousness, be mindful of the things you will say not to hurt her feelings (assuming that you feel she does like you). You just don’t disappear because real men don’t do that. Now if you have been dating for months and you want to end it, then you should be prepared on what you want to say. Months or even years of dating means you’ve shared something intimate and special and it is just rude to just say you wan’t out. Think twice or thrice on the things you want to say.
2. Do it in person.
There is no other way to do it. You don’t do it through text, you don’t do it through phone call, and you don’t definitely ask your friends to relay the message. That’s being straight up jerk. Breaking up in person means you treasured what you once had. It may sound cheesy and all but since you are the one breaking up with a girl, then you have to at least man up and treat her right even. That’s just being cheesy for the last time so just do it, man.
3. Let go and relax.
Letting go means no more late night calling after the break up and after that dreaded thing, relax and chill. Go out with your friends or go back to the dating scene immediately. It is completely up to you. Even if you are not that invested in a relationship, breaking up is stressful so it is just right to shake things off a little after it. And you know, try not to think about how the girl is dealing too much. Girls move on faster than you think, you know.
4. Be kind and respectful.
At the end of the day, you are a man. You are not just a shallow teenager who just want to date the popular girls and talk about her to your friends. Real men don’t do that. Let the break up take its course and try not to talk about it — in a disrespectful kind of way — to your friends. It also helps to just be nice and gentle so you can’t hurt her feelings further.
Breaking up with someone, really, is not an easy task. It involves feelings and mostly guts. A Lot of them, actually. You should consider what you want before making everything final. By final, it means no more late night urges to meet or drunk calls, dude. You must also plan the things you want to do after the breakup because even if you have dated for a short period of time, some things will indeed change. Most likely for the girl. So man up and just go with it!