Members get unlimited access to all our most
valuable content long before the masses. Exclusive access to newly released gear and tech and entrepreneur secrets delivered to your inbox monthly. All free. No BS.

The Complete Guide To Being a Great Wingman

Sailun Tires

What is a Wingman? He or She is the essential partner in crime when it comes to picking up women. This person is responsible for breaking the ice and covering your back when needed. A wingman ploys to talk to and distract the prime target’s buddies. The pilot then tries to pick up the target female when at a club, restaurant, or bar. Basically, the wingman is the guy or girl who helps out when entering hostile territories.

Before we get into explaining the pickup methodology, let us explain the preliminaries of male and female grouping.

The Male Group
This group is usually two or three guys (you can work with more but it can be less effective). The first guy, Greg, has been dating a girl for the last six months. Then there is David, who is single and just out to have fun. Finally there is Chris, who is looking to pick up a girl tonight.

Greg – Primary Wingman
The primary wingman is a person who is dating or married and is willing to take one for the team. He is responsible for breaking the ice and infiltrating a group of girls. He should not worry about getting rejected because he is already dating someone or is married.

David – Secondary Wingman
The secondary wingman has taken this role because he is just out to have a good time or was late in finding a primary target. Chris has found a primary target first, or someone has shown interest in Chris, so David will have to play wingman for this pickup.

Chris – Pilot
The pilot is the first person to find a girl that he is interested in or is the first person who finds a girl who is interested in him. He is the one that is most likely going to ask for the phone number and will have to close the deal with this girl.

The Female Group
Females flock in groups of two or more. They usually hang out with people that are not as pretty as them so they can be the best looking girl there, which means that there will always be a female who is below average in looks. Sara is a female who is very attractive. Beth is a female who is average looking. Finally, Joanne is a female who is below average in looks.

Sara – Primary Target
This is the person that Chris wants to pick up. She is usually the most attractive of the group. Sara dresses well, her hair is done, and she looks like a million dollars.

Beth – Wing Woman
Beth is average looking and is there to have fun with the girls. She is looking to get picked up but doesn’t get picked up as much as Sara does.

Joanne – The Rational Girl
Joanne is at the bar usually just to drive the girls home safely. This person does not go to the bar very often and isn’t that much fun. She is the person that stops the other girls from going home with guys who are out to pick them up. This is the girl that is usually known as the ‘cock block.’

Responsibilities of a Wingman
There are many responsibilities of a wingman. First of all, they are there to break the ice when it comes to penetrating into a group of females. They are there to talk to the primary target’s friends – which likely leads to talking about chick flicks, buying them drinks, dancing with them, and even talking to the below average looking girls. Nevertheless, this person has a lot of responsibility and needs to fulfill his obligations no matter what the cost is.

Be Prepared
You should always be prepared when you are out picking up women since the responsibility of wingman and pilot can switch in an instant. A woman may show interest in the wingman when you are playing pilot, so don’t be surprised when it happens. While playing pilot, make sure you are prepared to fulfill the responsibilities of a wingman as well, entertaining the females if required.

Wingman Training
When it comes to training to be a wingman, there are a few things that you should learn. Women love talking about themselves. But when you are talking to the other females (wing women) who are not as attractive as the primary target, you will find that they do not have the confidence that the primary target has. You will learn about what movies and TV shows to talk about, what drinks they like, and other topics of conversation. It may sound ridiculous, but you will soon be following a unwritten script in your head about things to talk about. If you play wingman enough it will become second nature to you.

Good and Bad Wing Men
There are always good and bad apples in every group. When looking for a wingman, you want someone that is decent looking and is outgoing. This person should have good conversational skills and have a great personality. The best person for this spot is a person who is average looking and is married or dating. In any case, the person should be able to hold a conversation.

You should definitely stay away from having alcoholic friends playing wingman. You don’t need their sly comments or slurring to prevent you from closing the deal. Furthermore, the female will associate you with your drunk friends and this may hurt your close. Boring guys that have nothing to say about life or current events should be cut from the wingman group. Sure he may like Star Trek and Dungeons and Dragons, but does he know what a clitoris is? Finally, keep the shy person at home because he will not keep the conversation alive for longer than 2 minutes. You need someone to help you, not someone you need to save if they can’t speak to a girl.

The Approach
Once one person has singled out the primary target, the group has to co-operate and figure out their approach. Here is the basic approach for a three on three situation.

Initial Contact – The primary wingman will go up and break the ice with the rational girl. If this girl is getting picked up then the other girls don’t have to worry about her. This increases the chances of the other guys picking up the girls.

Secondary Contact – The pilot will then walk by the primary wingman. The primary wingman will introduce the pilot to the primary target and then the rest of the group.

Show Interest – The pilot has to show that he is interested in one person. Thus, he should concentrate on the primary target.

Infiltration – It is now the secondary wingman’s responsibility to occupy the other girls. He walks by and the primary wingman introduces him to the other girls. He will keep the wing women busy as the pilot tries to get the primary target’s number.

There are four main outcomes that can occur:

Primary scores
If the primary contact closes the deal and gets the phone number, or even takes the female home, then the mission has been completed. The wingman may also close with one of the other girls, but this was not the primary mission.

Primary Contact Fails
The group is there to increase the chances of the primary contact closing the deal. If for some reason the pilot is having some problems, then you are there to help him out. If for some odd reason the pilot has to jump ship, then the primary target is up for grabs. The wingman can keep pursuing his targets or move on to the primary target.

Wingman Scores
If the wingman scores and the pilot doesn’t score, then it was still a successful mission. In any event, you should try to figure out why the pilot couldn’t close and try to fix the problem in your next mission.

Wingman Fails

If you choose a bad wingman or for some reason the wingman was rude while performing his duties, the situation can backfire right in front of you. This can ruin the pilot’s night. The wingman’s responsibility is to keep the other girls occupied, but situations do arise where a wingman may fail. If this occurs you can either abort the mission or the pilot may have to fly solo.

The Best Wingman
The best wingman is not a male. If you have a good female friend who will stick by you when you are picking up females, your chances will increase dramatically. Imagine the situation where there is one female (primary target), yourself, and your female wingman. If the female wingman talks highly of you to her, she has already broken the ice and has given you have some brownie points on the side.

Imagine your female wingman say things like:

”This guy is smart, athletic, and a real catch.”

This situation works well because the primary target will automatically trust another female. The primary target will comfortably think that there is no ulterior motive, and assume that a female would not lie to another female. So, because she has pointed you out as a good catch, you should easily close the deal.

Working in Groups

When there are a bunch of you in a group looking for girls, remember the necessity of a good wingman. I would suggest that you stay away from large groups and stick to groups of two or three. No matter what, the group should stick together and have a master plan when approaching girls. Sometimes, if there are only two of you, the wingman may have to take the responsibilities of two wing men. In this case practice definitely makes perfect. And always remember, never fear rejection!

source: The Players Guide



Get the latest Swagger Scoop right in your inbox.

By checking this box, you confirm that you have read and are agreeing to our terms of use regarding the storage of the data submitted through this form.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *